Have you ever felt like you aren't old enough, wise enough, strong enough in your faith, etc, to show the face of Jesus? As if you're not good enough or you're not doing something right?
A few months ago, I was sitting down to lunch with the children's ministry director at our church, discussing whether or not I was going to take over the children's choir at New Hope. I was worried at first. I had never directed a choir before, and this included musicals too. I was starting my first semester of college, I was coaching a soccer team, I was working, I was playing soccer myself...I felt like I was really packing my schedule and this made me nervous. After a lot of prayer, I decided I was going to take on this as well and don't get me wrong, I was excited, but I didn't know what to expect.
Often when I'm directing and teaching, I get flustered. There are 30 kids running around the room, they're all singing different pitches, the boys want to bang on things and the girls want to do ballet...it's crazy. This Sunday, I walked into the room and immediately stuck my foot in my mouth when I started talking about Joseph and asking all sorts of questions. After a few minutes, I looked down at the lesson and realized I was less prepared than I had even thought. The lesson was on Jacob, not Joseph. I quickly pretended that was on purpose and switched over to Jacob, reading the lesson word for word and wishing I could restart. Good Andi. (silently smacking myself)
As the morning went on, I seemed to get more and more caught up in none other than me. We were doing solo auditions and as I looked around the room, I was shocked by something. Watching these kids, I realized that I was not teaching them, they were teaching me. Hailey was teaching me courage, as she volunteered to be the first one to audition. Nataleigh taught me selflessness, as she took on the task of printing off new audition papers for me when I ran out, even though she was auditioning herself. James taught me perseverance, as he struggled through his audition, and still stood up there and sang until the last note with a smile on his face. Summer taught me patience, as the time dragged on and she was the last one, having to stay 10 minutes after class to sing for me and not complaining once. Grace taught me love, as she helped each and every younger child rehearse before it was there turn to go. Christian taught me kindness, as he came and thanked me profusely for teaching and let me know what a wonderful time he had. That put a huge smile on my face. Joshua taught me enthusiasm, as he clapped and cheered for everybody as he waited his turn to sing. Kate taught me encouragement, as she helped her sister build up the confidence to audition.
They were showing me the face of Christ in the little things they were doing and I was in awe of each and every one of them. It's more clear than ever that no one is too young to display God's love. I am seeing it every week in 1st-6th graders and it amazes me. It has been such a blessing to work with these amazing kids and I am so excited to see how much more they will teach me throughout the year. Keep on keeping on. You never know who is watching.